I overheard a conversation in church, a very meaningful one.

Just behind my pew, a mother and a daughter were sitting and waiting for the mass to commence. The daughter said, in an anticipating voice, "Where is Jesus? How do I see him?"

The mother replied, "You have to BELIEVE to see him. And when you grow up and you truly believe, you will see him."

A simply reply, yet a hard one to do. How deep is your faith?

26 December 2010

It's Boxing Day today and I walked totally aimlessly around Eaton Centre amidst the huge crowd just banging you off your shoulders. These people are crazy!! I wanted to enter Abercrombie & Fitch and when I saw the line, I nearly fainted.


I had nothing in mind this year. Nothing struck me as interesting either. It was nice just to window shop and see others shop so I had fun too. Eaton centre had this huge christmas tree with all the Swarovski bling blings on it.

So far this winter break, I lost count the number of times I went downtown. I tried to make it less miserable but it still is. *hiak hiak*

I went...

1. The bata shoe museum


Lots of shoe history inside. Some really swept me off my feet. How shoes represented the different ranking in society and how they differed with religions.....etc.

2. Royal Ontario Museum aka ROM

ROM had so many things to see. Didn't have enough time to see them all so will make a second trip there....woohoo...my favourite....dinossss!!!

They reminded me of what I used to learn in BIO 153.

3. CN Tower @ night

I guess I went at the wrong time but nevertheless, it was amazingly stunning with lights flickering at the horizon.

full moon in toronto

I am here at this hour because of insomnia. ARghhhh....good night people.

4.59pm

I decided to shut down my laptop. Brain jammed. Headed towards Student Centre and into the faith sharing room.

Oriana shared a beautiful story so I would like to share it here, whether or not you've heard of this before.

There was this woman, she dreamt of Jesus saying to her that he's going to her house tomorrow. So the next day, she cleaned her house top and bottom till spotless, cooked luxurious meals and then waited for Jesus to come.

She waited and waited and then came a knock on the door. It was her neighbour asking for help desperately. However, she turned her down, saying she was waiting for Jesus and couldn't leave.

She continued waiting and then came another knock on the door. This time it was her friend coming for a visit. Afraid that her friend might make a mess of her house, she asked her to come another day for she is waiting for Jesus.

Approaching dusk, another knock on the door. This time it was a beggar asking for some food. She shoved the beggar away, not wanting to give a little of the food that she had cooked.

And then she waited, and night fell but Jesus did not come. That night, she dreamt of Jesus again. This time she asked "Why didn't you come? I waited for you and cleaned and cooked." Jesus replied, "I was the neighbour, the friend and the beggar. But you did not invite me in."



This coming Advent, what would you do to prepare yourself for His coming? It's not only pleasing God, but an act of kindness matters too

Things are starting to get busier again.

Status of brain now: as blurry as the fog that lands in Mississauga today.

Not everything ends with a perfect note, but at least everything ends on a note.

Thank you all these while

Autumn

It's really pretty to see trees changing colours, especially those burning red and striking yellow against an almost black branch.



At the same time, it's kind of sad to see leaves dropping off so fast, revealing all that the tree has, nothing but it's own trunk.

Happy Thanksgiving

It's Thanksgiving today in Canada....Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

The best thing is that it's holiday today. At least I get to have my break. Ever since I had class on Saturday, it feels like my weekend is just left with Sunday =(

Ah well, we had a celebration of Thanksgiving last night, the Korean way. Now who says turkey is a must on thanksgiving? I hate turkeys.....for some reasons =)

Pork belly BBQ with kimchi


And of course with Soju

Ja Jiang mian

The food was nice and so was the feeling of drinking soju, though the rest said it tasted like disinfectant XD. I have taste problem, seriously.

Before I stop writing I have something to share from my church bulletin and here it goes

Let us be thankful....


Let us be thankful for the blessings we receive
Let us be thoughtful of others.

Let us remember dear and close friends
Ler us have faith in tomorrow

Let us live life as a Golden Rule
Let us find sunlight through the clouds
Let us believe

Liet us be the people we have the ability to be
Let us have understanding

Ler us say the thanks in prayer
To God, for the gifts He has give.

For everyday that He has given me and for everything around me, good or bad. THANK YOU!!!

Take a look at your heart

It's really hectic these few days, downpour of midterms and assignments and lab reports. Nevertheless, I'm trying my best to enjoy every moment of it, despite sleepless nights that turned my eyes "panda-ry"

It was a really crazy night last night and I was rushing to get over what I've procrastinated the whole week, my Bio lab report. Slept at 6.30am, woke up for class at 10am. I hope I can finish my chem report before midnight tonight.

I love Bio labs though. Last week I had my heart beats measured. It felt kind of fun, with electrodes stuck on you, never knowing when you'll get electrocuted.

Seeing your own heart beat is like an expecting mother seeing her own ultrasound scan (okay, maybe I exaggerated a little).




Looks pretty normal eh? Wait till you label every segment and you will go "Alamak..."

You see, different people have different heartbeats. People in love will have an ECG diagram like this...



And if you're in LOVE with Macs, you'll see an ECG like this...




So, my main point is that, my ECG looked like neither, so I'm not in love and I don't love Macs. XD. I find this diagram interesting and funny though, how an ECG component corresponds to school life and it looks soooo true!!

So how's your heart like? Whatever it is, I sure hope it's not a straight line =) dup dup dup dup..

Sometimes, the obvious answer is there.

And with quite a high percentage of certainty I could just say it's correct.

But why am I refusing to believe? Why do I persist that the answer is wrong? Why am I accepting the smaller percentage instead of the larger one?

People say this kind of feeling arises from intuition. That's the funny part, my intuition tells me to follow the more obvious answer but some part of me just want to take the road less travelled.

I might get hurt, I might break down but there's a part of me that would like to trample that ground again.

Am I even sure? The future seems so bleak, but wait a minute, since when is a future clear? It's worth a try, or is it not?

The first day of class and....

1. The printer broke down so I ended up not having any notes to bring to class....which made me feel bored because I had nothing to scribble on and thus leading to....


2. Sleepiness in class, to be exact in every class and then it led to


3. Doodles....




Wondering how I'll survive this semester

A sunday in Mississauga

9.43am : *Gasp* I just realised I was late for the 6E bus. So I ran downstairs only to find my landlord calling me 'loser' (his way of greeting us).

9.48am : *Waiting at bus stop* Totally late for the bus. After accepting the truth, I started walking down Ballyclare Dr. It was really blustery and my jacket nearly got blown away. The houses along the streets were all very pretty, but I just hate the strong wind blowing in my face.
I finally reached my church after 10 minutes of speedy walking. I went to have a look at this new church in the neighbourhood. But I guess I still prefer the St Ignatius Loyola.

After mass was done, I had a walk back, but this time a leisure walk. It was pretty nice even though the sun was quite high in the sky already. Was about to walk back home when I suddenly had a crazy idea of walking in the opposite direction towards Erindale Park.

So I walked, and walked...

You see, Erindale Park is really nice


You can go to have picnic or bbq


Or you can have some family time there



Flying kites




Fishing





Or be like me, having a walk while taking photos at the same time





It was a wonderful day for a walk

Early morning and it's quiet, only noises from the landlord downstairs.

I'm feeling pretty cold right now. It's funny how few days ago I was browsing through every aisle in Walmart looking for a fan and now it's cold. Oh well, or else there won't be a simile called 'as fickle as the weather'.

Few days of unpacking and I think I'm almost there. Mind you it's not because that I have lots of stuff that it takes me few days. I don't know why it takes me so long either.

Have been doing a lot of shopping but I ended buying stuff that I don't need.

School's starting soon and things are going to get busier, which reminds me of the books I need to buy later. I hope I can achieve more from this year.

Tata~



Note to self : Learn mind control XD

You know that feeling inside you. The lost of communication...

You have something to say but your throat is croaked dry.

You feel like writing it down, probably easier than saying it out, but your fingers are stiffened like arthritis.

Or maybe some body language or expression can help convey your message, but the other person never gets it.

Then you just give up. Period.

Silence

Absolute silence. My hearing was minimized and I could hardly hear. All I could feel was my heart thumping repeatedly in a chaotic beat against my chest.

Even writing this now, I can barely hear. Something is wrong with my left ear AGAIN.

Only at times like this do I realise how people feel when they lose their hearing. To put it in a general way, how people feel when they lose an ability they got so used to everyday.

While waiting for my airplane to arrive in KK's terminal, I seated myself behind two elderly couple on wheelchairs. Without realising much, I opened Dan Brown's Angels and Demons and was oblivious with my surrounding until an anouncement blared over the whole departure lounge.

A guy stood up and started pushing one of the disabled couple. It suddenly struck me that how life is when you cannot walk. Having a part of your body but having no control over it is devastating.

When I was in the plane, I guess the pressure was too high that my ears were both blocked. Oh well that's pretty normal. However, after several swallows of water and slightly before the plane landed, my eardrums hurt, felt like they were being pierced. Now that, was pretty abnormal.

And so back to the beginning of my story, I was surrounded by absolute silence and I prayed, hard.

I prayed that I will not lose my hearing. That I can be able to hear the lovely sounds of nature and of God's creation again.

And it dawns on me, how I treasure things only when I am about to lose them.

A walk at the beach

I just love the beach.

Looking at the water rolling up the sands just soothes my mind. In addition to that, it just reminds me how beautiful God's creation is.

Miri beach

And I love to watch the sunset. The streaks of orangy sunlight overpowering the sky, stretching out its lovely waves to everyone there.

The beach is a place of relief, just by listening to the sounds of waves crashing against the shore.

Despite what people said about the beach, about what occurs every 3 years, I find myself rejoicing at the thought of a trip to the beach.

So what do you say? Would you join me for a walk along the beach?

The day I've been looking forward to has finally arrived.

I've only slept for 2 hours and 30 minutes approximately. My eyes feel tired but I am pretty alert now, listening to Konayuki ^^ as the sun slowly creeps out.

When I was lying down just now trying to sleep, a lot of things ran through my mind.

Seems like there are a lot of things that I would like to do during this break. But, will I be able to do them all?

There are also changes that I would want to make, self reflections and self improvement. Will I be able to do so? It's always easier said than done. How much discipline will I have to give myself to push forward?

A lot of things can happen within a day, needless to say within 4 months.

Geesh I don't even know what I am crapping about.

Anyway, I can smell lovely breakfast in the air. Ham...which sadly isn't for me.

Oh well counting down, roughly 14 hours to flight. Am I even ready????

Memories

One more day

Another day before heading to the airport and going back to Malaysia. What I can say is that time flies so fast. It felt just like yesterday that I graduated from ICPU, that I just reached
Canada.

ICPU graduation

Now, it's time for juniors to go through the paths that I've been through the past 8 months. Oh man I can't accept this!!!! @@ Time please slow down.....

As I looked back, I wish I could relive the moments, those happy times, back in secondary school back in ICPU.

Secondary school years were those times where I enjoyed fooling around. In Form 1, I was introduced to a school very different from my primary school and enjoyed the 2-week-orientation. I remembered there was one temporary teacher who taught my class BM and left within a week because my class was too noisy.

In Form 2, I met a crazy friend who happened to be my sister's ex-classmate's sister. Yeah..those crazy times at the balcony. I even got punished for being noisy.

There was nothing much in Form 3 that I could think of. I was probably getting a little more serious and less of the running.

In the upper forms, I enjoyed fooling around during spot checks or in laboratories where it wasn't that strict compared to labs in universities now. Somehow I liked those times when I got locked out of Physics Lab for being late too. I missed printing out letters of absence and skipping classes. I enjoyed being a librarian where you get access to all the new books. School concerts which came once a year gave me lots of wonderful memories as well with all the crazy hairstylings and make-ups.

Concert 2007

Prefects' Camp 2006

Prefects' Dinner 2007

In ICPU,

I enjoyed walking every Sunday to church, felt the breeze blowing, the early sunshine and the endless trips to Summit after church. I still think of my room once in a while. I missed Genting trips even though it only lasted for 2 days. I missed going down to the first floor in Casa Subang to eat.

BTN

At Genting

After Genting

Sunday buddies

In Emirates

Sandalwood

There are lots more to describe but the feeling would of course be different. The best thing in life is not heard, seen or touched but felt with the heart.

There are some things that I wished hadn't happened but when I look back now, I am glad they did for they are lifelong lessons for keepsake.

For everything, you'll be in my heart always

28 April 2010

Another trip to Square One and today Baskin Robbins had great sale??? 31 cents per scoop for from 5pm to 9pm.

So after walking around into Body Shop and Bath and Body Works smelling every scent in there, we walked to the small Baskin Robbins stall where we found a long line of people queuing up already and it's only 4.45pm!!

Like the rest, we tailed behind the long line and waited and waited despite the tired legs.


I got marked on the hand for it too.



After going one round around the shopping complex, we came back to Baskin Robbins again and ordered another two scoops. However the lady at the Baskin Robbins recognised us and told us that we were not allowed to have more than one round of BR...

Well, that's kind of weird. It's business and isn't it better to have more people buying?

Oh well, it's roughly 3 days away before I am flying back....woohoo...paradise here I come. Need a break from the life here.

26 April 2010

It's 4.02 am and I am still wide awake. No feeling of sleepiness at all. Probably due to oversleeping during the day. Well it's time for me to get used to the time in Malaysia too.

I just finished a drama titled "One litre of tears" a few days ago. It's a really nic e, touching drama. Had lots of values that a lot of people don't realised in everyday life, for instance family, friendship, love and personal values.

Was touched by how their family was pulled together despite everything. When Aya found out she had her incurable disease, they did not give up on her but instead, they supported her and gave her encouragement all the time. Her parents showered their love, providing out of their financial capabilities to support her.

Realised that a lot of people around you can be your friends, but a few really care. A lot of people may laugh with you but only a few who will cry with you in times of sadness and difficulties. Like how Saki complained about Aya...as compared to Mari. The difference really portrayed the different kinds of friends you have in your life.

Was touched by Asou's love for Aya. Once again, Asou and Aya's senior were totally opposite. One abandoned her when he knew she was sick but Asou never left her. Despite her condition, Asou loved her nonetheles, knowing that she won't last long.

Was admiring Aya's determination to live on, despite her sickness. A smart student but ended up being vegetable. It makes you realise too how fragile life can be. Life is unexpected and that is why we should treasure every moment of it. Anything can happen and this is why a little setback shouldn't bring us down for there are worse things that can happen in life. Nobody says life is easy but it can be a happy one depending on the perspective you look at.




One litre of tears.

A touching drama that can really make you cry one litre of tears and is worth rewatching.

20 April 2010

Today I sat for my last test, Calculus which I sometimes think it sounded like Cactus and it indeed feels like I've been sitting on a cactus since the past few days too. But now, I am OFFICIALLY FREE. Even though I had not much feeling, probably post-exam syndrome (wait, does that even exist?), I feel somehow...good.

Say goodbye to First Year of Life Sciences, and hello soon to the second year, which marks the starting of specialization (Biotech). Geesh, still can't believe it. In two weeks' time I'll be outta here.

A recap of how everything changes since I got here. Adapting took me a really long time. It was really stressful at first but somehow everything turned better in the second semester.

I experienced autumn the first time I got here. Felt really cold even though it was like 16 degrees that time....to me now 16 degrees is hot now....change number 1.

From autumn

To Winter

and now spring!!!

Change number 2: Personal Growth
You began realising more of humans around you. And you came to realise their expectations and their perceptions about you. But when you have heard too much, the whole thing smacks you in your face like a boomerang. So, you begin changing yourself and slowwwwly as time goes by, everything changes and so do I. Positively, I think I am more matured now compared to if I were staying at home. Living with a bunch of people you just came to know required tolerance and well lots of patience because different people have different (should I say) style of living. I learnt to handle things not anymore by compelling not anymore by rejecting. I've grown more spiritually too, realising that no matter what happens, He is there by me all the time because He makes all things beautiful in His time. Therefore, don't judge anyone by their appearance just because they are not beautiful in your eyes, they are still creations of God.

And little bits of changes

Oh well last semester I did not do much but this semester I started looking for some voluteering to do. It satisfies you as much as a big buffet lunch!! Wanted to help the Canadian Cancer Society in selling daffodils but noone replied me. Anyway next time then.

Had more Starbucks this year. Especially during the study week when you have excessive basic dollars and endless trips to the library. And did I tell you how convenient it is to have Starbucks just beside the library. When you are memorising Biology or doing series for Calculus....starbucks help you clear your mind (P/S I did not receive any fees for advertising XD)

Oh well, this was probably my longest post, but I am pretty sure it's because of those pictures that I put up. I will be moving out of Mc Luhan Court soon, in a few days' time. Just like the feeling I had before moving out of Casa, I think this place will be a nostalgic one. Store your dorm just came with their boxes and will be packing real soon.

My room in casa....long time no see...

This is what I bought to BTN...and snacking almost every night....geee

And last but not least I am looking forward to sitting down at the table with my lovely family again....

And now Ida...did you think I have forgotten you? Haha then you are wrong!!! I miss you every second (ok maybe not every second...i guess you'll freak out if I do)....and Tse Yui arhhhh....why you come back sooo late ahhh? But still glad you are back when I am still in Miri. By then don't run away arrr...

Kaihan came today and since Mississauga has nothing much to see, we ended up playing Foozeball in the Student Centre.


But we still ended up having lots of fun =)

Enjoying every moment of exam-free life.....!!!!